We all live with a voice within that talks to us, whether we want to hear it or not. (If your inner voice is positive and encouraging, this post isn’t for you. This post is about the negative voices that sabotage us from within.)
The voice might be the voice of a parent, a stepparent, a teacher, a coach… It’s someone who left a mark. The sound of their voice may be pervasive, or it may only speak up about one area of your life. It might tell you that you’ll never be an athlete. It might tell you that you’ll never be an artist. Or it might just sow seeds of doubt into whatever you set your hand to. The voice within can cover lots of existential territories.
My voice within likes to raise an alarm whenever I have any semblance of success. She questions the value and validity of the success, then asks if it’s worthy of praise, or if it even matters in the grand scheme of things. If that doesn’t dull my shine (I’m perfectly capable of dulling my own shine, by the way), then the voice reminds me that if everyone likes what I’m doing, I’m mere breaths from major destruction, or obviously doing something wrong. If THAT doesn’t work, the voice raises the shadow of superstition: good must be balanced with bad… am I ready for the dark side? The balance? Can’t have anything positive without accompanying negative, you know. If I succeed, something awful will probably happen to me or my loved ones. Par for the course, the voice says.
Logically, I know this is all great fodder for therapy.
Practically, I know I’m not the only one dealing with an inner voice of sabotage. I lived a long time without recognizing that “the voice” wasn’t the voice of truth. It’s taken therapy—and a hefty dose of major trauma—to realize “the voice” isn’t reality; it’s just a crappy recording, twisted to fit the situation at hand.
I’m making an effort to turn “the voice” off. What about you? How do you deal with “the voice”?